I heard a man preach about this topic a while back. Now maybe I’m just a hillbilly but these words, as simple as they are, have stuck with me!
NO TRESPASSING/NO FISHING
These words were used in a sermon, and they have helped me immensely with some of my PTSD issues. I have discovered that I can use those words to give advice to others too. I was asked the other day exactly what these words mean to me, and to explain why they have stick with me. After dwelling on this question for several days without being able to put an answer into words, my wife said something to me that made the answer so simple and so clear.
I’ll explain! NO TRESPASSING means you shouldn’t be there! NO FISHING means just that, DON’T FISH THERE. So when we give God our burdens he takes them and they are no longer ours. So don’t trespass to find them and live with them again. When we ask for God to forgive us of our sins He does. He casts our sins into the Sea of Forgetfulness where they are forgotten by Him. That’s where it needs to stay. NO FISHING means not to go fishing in the Sea of Forgetfulness to try and catch and remember those memories.
With all that said, here is the answer as to why these words MEAN so much to me. To be honest there is no exact answer. Let me explain. Every situation is different. Every memory is different. My state of mind is different from minute to minute in any situation. NO TRESPASSING can mean one thing if I go back to that memory/place willingly to deal with it. It may mean something different if I go there to offer help to another person from that particular experience. It has a very different meaning if a memory intrudes on me when I don’t want it to. These situations can happen at any time. Some happen quite often to me. This has all lead me to understand that NO TRESPASSING and NO FISHING means that I am not supposed to go back to those memories and stay there. I might have to walk through them but I can not camp out there and let them pull me back in.
When we give God our burdens, He takes them away from us, why should we trespass to take them back? When God forgives us of our sins and throws them into the Sea of Forgetfulness, why would we go fishing for them?
Bottom line is this! NO TRESPASSING to take our burdens back! NO FISHING to remember our sins again!
This is one of the tools that I have learned to use to help myself. I hope you can find meaning in it as well.
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Welcome to Relentless Warrior’s Legacy! My name is Melissa and my husband is Lawrence. Would would like to introduce ourselves and tell you a bit about us and our family.
Lawrence and I have been married for over 19. We currently live in Kentucky and we love it here. We have 3 amazing boys that keep us pretty busy. Another part of our story that is hard to talk about is the loss of our twin boys. We lost them at 14 weeks. It has been by far the hardest thing our family has been though.
Lawrence has been a firefighter for over 20 years. He started as a volunteer and moved on the air force. He served our country for over 15 years. In that time, he deployed 3 times and did a year remote in Korea. We were stationed at Malmstrom, Whiteman, Hickam, and Travis along those 15 years. He has also worked at Camp Gurnsey army reserve base and now he is currently a fire inspector for Department of Defense. Lawrence also loves to hunt and fish. He goes to the gun range as often as he can but his biggest love next to me is his Harley Davidson. Lawrence will ride that bike as much as the weather allows him to.
I have been a stay at home mom for over 16 years. Now that my boys are older I have started a craft blog called Yellow Butterfly Craft Designs. Crafting is my happy place and something I wish I could do more often. I am also starting this blog. So must of my days are spent writing at the moment.
We go to church in our little town and love our church family. We have both been saved for over 15 years and are grateful for Jesus and God’s mercy and love every day. Lawrence and I feel we are both being called to a PTSD marriage ministry. We want to help individuals and their families who suffer from PTSD. So that is where Relentless Warrior’s Legacy comes in.
PTSD has been in our lives and marriage for over 15 years. Lawrence has it from being a firefighter and EMT. He struggles with triggers, anger, nightmares, and panic attacks. He has tried several medications, therapies and other tactics to keep his PTSD under control. Two main things have been key to him maintaining a balances life with PTSD. One is one-on-one therapy every 2 weeks. The other is talking to groups of like-minded people who have been where he is and understands him and what he is going through.
My story is a bit different when it comes to PTSD. Mine if from the death of my mother and then the death of my father a years and two weeks later. I also struggle with losing our twins. I have a few triggers and really struggle during a certain times of year to maintain my life and keep pushing forward. There are times where my PTSD has consumed me but I am working though it. I do things like a daily gratitude practice, trying to drink water and eat things that are good for me, and I really take the time to do things I love like crafting. These things have changed my life and how I manage PTSD.
Relentless Warrior’s Legacy, or RWL for short, has powerful meanings just in the name. Relentless means never giving up. You must be relentless for you, your life, and the life you want for your family. You must be a warrior to push through all the nastiness of PTSD. This is just another battle that can and will be won. Warriors do not give up. Finally the legacy part. We want to help others leave a great legacy and be proud of that. It takes work from not only the person with PTSD but also from those around them to help build that legacy.
RWL has a few aspects to it. The first is that we meet with men on the first Tuesday and women on the second Tuesday of every month. Here we talk about things like communication, battle strategies. leaving a better legacy for a children, and so many other topics that all help a person live with PTSD and not just suffer from it. Second, we are planning to go speak at churches and other group meetings to help spread our message about PTSD and start breaking down the walls and stigmas around PTSD. As you are reading here we have a blog. There will be weekly posts about different topics like some things to combat nightmares or how to better communicate with your spouse. We have a Facebook group and Instagram page that will be filled with encouragement and other activities to keep others going all week. And coming soon a Youtube channel where Lawrence and I will talk about all things dealing with PTSD.
Lawrence and I have had to work really hard not just individually but also in our marriage to work through the PTSD. We have seen a few counselors and we had one that taught us how to communicate and have patience with each other. God has shown us how to give each other grace and to love each other more when times are hard. We know that marriages suffer when PTSD is involved but there are ways to fight for your marriage and your spouse. We want to show that.
We also want to make it very clear that others are not alone and there are people willing to help. There is a stigma when it comes to PTSD and we want to work to break that. We want those with PTSD to live their lives and control their PTSD, not suffer with it. One thing to keep in mind is that we are not experts and not everything will work for every person. These are our experiences and the experiences of those around us. We hope our story can help others with their PTSD and their relationships with those around them.
Relentless Warrior's Legacy 